"Some people have to live like this, all the time," I thought to myself the day when Riley was coming home alone on the bus and there was fighting going on. I've been thinking about that a lot lately, how sometimes we experience something difficult for a period of time, yet others may face that sort of thing their entire life. After recent events here, I could have a little more empathy for mothers in both the Gaza Strip and Israel and the fear they live with all the time.
We hear stories and we are moved, but for how long? And to what end? We may care about people on the other side of the world, but because their lives are so different from ours, our concern may never turn into action. But I've been thinking about that. It's true that if you go to a place and share experiences with any given people, that you will change and you will likely be moved to bring hope in whatever way you can. But not everyone can go and physically experience life in it's joys and tragedies with others. Yet, I wonder, could there be more to the experiences of our own lives, reasons beyond what we normally think of.What if, somewhere, someone has lived with this pain their entire life and has no resources to ever get out of it? Many of us have been told that one reason we experience hard times is so we can better empathise with others. Now that has never made my hard times any easier to bear! But usually, if I keep my heart open, and vulnerable I might add, the pain comes back to me in another person's story and I am moved to compassion. Compassion, according to Wikipedia, is a profound human emotion prompted by the pain
of others. More vigorous than empathy, the feeling commonly gives rise to an active desire to alleviate an other's suffering.
So what do we do with that active desire? For instance, if you have endured abuse or lived well below the poverty line, you will likely be deeply moved by Slumdog Millionare. If you lost a parent when you were young, your heart will break more than mine for the orphans at the train station. The list could go on, but my point is, we feel that active desire, but how often do we help it to stay active. There is a whole world full of need, I don't know where to start, I'll just live my life, thank you very much.
Yet, where you are, you can live out compassion that will go beyond the borders of your land. Being aware of your own pain is a start. If you have no energy to "go out and make a difference" let the stories find you. And when a story finds you, walk with it awhile, listen. Perhaps it came to you because you would be able to understand it in a way that no one else could. Our suffering is only lost when we choose to let it be. I so much want my suffering to be a gain for me, but not just me. I want it to enable me to walk in the shoes of others, to actively make a difference for them too. I think sometimes, we are overwhelmed by the bigness of it, that we do nothing at all. Yet, every big and good change in the world has begun by a teeny tiny step and a generous heart.
Okay, you may be wondering why I posted the photo I did. Years ago, when I was here as a single and had grown very tired of all the stares and hassle I received as a woman, I decided to wear a burkha. Walking in the steps of another, with a dark veil over my eyes, was an eye-opening experience. For one thing, I could tell people were looking at my hands, trying to figure out who I really was, so it didn't give me the freedom I'd hoped it would. I still couldn't hide who I really was but that and many other experiences have helped me understand what life is like for women here. But to keep going on that line of thought, I would need to write a book! So I just want to leave you with the challenge to make a teeny step today.
